I'll Erase Everything You Know About Kidou
by KayleyWulf
Summary: Sakuma has loved Kidou all his life and their marriage has been blissful for almost three years now. But with Kidou going back to Raimon, he is barely home and doubts have surfaced in Sakuma's mind. He goes to an old friend for help, but could that very friend be the means of destroying everything he knows about himself, his life, and his husband?
1. How Pathetic

Of Sakuma marrying Kidou and that's why he is with him in GO, but after Kidou takes over Raimon, He gets so busy that Sakuma doesn't get to see him but he is so dependent on Kidou. Always has been. And he hates his absence, it drives him insane. Fudou and Genda try to comfort him by being over there and Genda still loves Sakuma to this day but has no heart to tell him. Fudou can't stand Sakuma as per usual, even though he i always with him and the guys and they bicker but know each other better than anyone else. So Fudou is over there one day and Sakuma is in only a loose button up that is only buttoned at the very bottom and boxers, (kidou's button up). Fudou watches him walk about the house and fidget and talk about their wedding and how they will be married 4 years in a week but he doesn't think Kidou will make it and Fudou is sick of listening to him whine and snaps at him "If he's so bad then why the FUCK did you marry him?!"

Sakuma stops and stares at him in shock by his words._'How could I marry Kidou?!'_ He is offended and pissed off and he pushes Fudou. This makes the brunette angry as well, naturally having a short fuse, and he grabs Sakuma's wrists and pushes him back until he has him pinned to the wall, fire in his eyes. Fudou slammed him into it with anger and is too pissed to realize Sakuma's shocked arousal. Fudou leans by his ear and his words come out on hot breaths that send chills down Sakuma's spine and all over his nerve system. "You are so pathetic you know it…huh? You spend all your time doting on him, depending on him. Like a puppet.. a pet… a slave…"

Sakuma feels anger boil up again as he listens. He hates how turned on he is and how even hearing those words does nothing but get him hotter. Fudou slides Sakuma's hands down the wall and puts his face up right by Sakuma's. their lips only inches apart. "You are nothing more than his little fangirl, huh?"

Sakuma lets a hand away and slaps him. Hating every word he says, hating how his entire being wishes he was that close again. Fudou stumbles back and is still for a moment. Sakuma knows Fudou is mad now if he wasn't before. He tries to walk away but before he knows it he is on his knees before Fudou, whose hand is locked in his hair. The Brunette leans down and gets a whole new flicker in his eyes. He looks over what he has in his hands. He has a man in almost nothing at all, tan and dangerous looking, at his mercy, weakness in his eyes, fight in his expression. Fudou's entire mood changes. "No… I'll help you… I can fix that codependency problem.."


	2. What We Did

Fudou's entire mood changes. "No… I'll help you… I can fix that codependency problem.."

Sakuma is confused and it shows in his eyes. Fudou grabs his arm and the darker man yelps in pain. Before he knows it he is against a wall with his hands pinned by his head. Fudou looks at him with a mysterious, dark look in his eyes. Sakuma panics and starts to fight against him. This only makes the brunette hold him tighter then he bites his lip. Sakuma yelps in surprise/pain. But slowly it becomes kissing. It's not slow, or gentle, or even sweet. Its hot and messy. Uncontrolled and even a bit angry. Fudou's lips are so soft but what he is doing is so intense. Sakuma's entire world spins around him and he gets dizzy from lack of air. He bites Fudou's lip hard, the brunette releases his lips.

The tanner man is gasping for breath, confused and turned on. He gasps out when he feels those same lips touch his neck. He gets that hot wet feeling trace his skin and it sends shivers over every inch of him. He wiggles, shifts, whines out in pleasure, but to no avail. He is trapped here. _'When did he get this STRONG?! I could at least fight him back when we were kids!"_

__Suddenly there is a breeze on Sakuma's arms as he feels Kidou's shirt rip off of him. His eyes lock on the fabric, watching it fall to the ground. Within a few more seconds, he is laid down on a hard surface and Fudou's lips are biting and pulling on skin around his nipples. Sakuma watches him and feels every muscle in his body giving in. Giving up and submitting. He knows this is wrong, he knows this is bad. But all thoughts and rational feeling are gone and no where to be found.

Fudou pulls back and smirks when he hears a disappointed whimper. He pulls his own shirt off and looks down at his prey with a dominating smirk. Sakuma looks up to him with dazed, wanting eyes that call to him with a plead. "Fudou..What-"

He bends a leg up between Sakuma's and props his knee on the surface his victim is on, rubbing against the obvious bulge there. He loves his gasps and helpless noises, "Just lay there and I'll make you feel better.. But if you move then I show no mercy.."

Sakuma knows he can't not react to this but tries to hold back leaning up to feel those lips again, even just a little. Fudou finally gives in and leans over him, hooking the mans leg around his waist and rubbing. His eyes gain a very predatory look when Sakuma moans. He likes that noise. "Don't worry… You'll forget all about the pain that man causes you… for the pain I'm going to cause you. he moves down and bites on the boys nipple, making him arch up and yell. Fudou continues to tease him that way and plays, leaving marks and bruises. Scratching his nails over his skin.

Sakuma almost can't breath right now. his heart is going so fast he can barely tell his own pulse. After what feels like hours of this torture he realizes his clothes and the brunettes are both missing. He sits up on his elbows to look helplessly down at his captor, who is currently tracing his happy train down to a harder part of him. His eyes widen and he braces himself. But nothing has him prepared for a mixed feeling on hot tongue and cold metal sliding over _him._ "AHH—"

Fudou smirks and continues his actions with great skill, teasing/playing with him until he can't hold in any longer. Sakuma's entire body reacts and lifts off the hard surface at the feeling of release. And his eyes darken with want, his cheek hot with embarrassment as he realizes that none of his liquid got anywhere. _'H-he swallowed it…' _

Fudou hears the door start to unlock from the other side of the house and curses. He puts Sakuma in the shower and throws his own clothes on before leaving out the window. Sakuma hears Kidou call out and is more than happy to pretend to be showering.

He _WILL_ shower… once he can stand again.. _'He's right… i can't even think about Kidou right now…'_


	3. I knew You Wold Come

Sakuma keeps thinking about what happened before. About what _he_ did to him…

_/ "Just lay there and I'll make you feel better.. But if you move then I show no mercy.." /_

The words haunted him now. He remembered every touch. Every bite, the feeling of cold metal. He shivers. Kidou is still at work and Genda won't answer his phone. Sakuma needs to be distracted. _'I am married on top of all this_' He goes through his phone. "Busy…working…working…on vacation..working…i hate you…working…" _'Ugh! The only person left that I can contact is the very person I'm avoiding!'_

Sakuma stares at his name. The name of the guy that torture him back during school. The guy that teased him and 'flirted' with Kidou just to piss Sakuma off.. The very man that he couldn't be in a room with without getting into a screaming fight… _'Or doing what we…'_

Sakuma shuts his phone and leaves the house for some fresh air. He needs out and about and he needs is NOW.

_'Fudou..'_

The tall, tan man stops in thought. He remembers high school then. All the pranks they pulled on each other. All the fights about nothing. All the insults. He remembers getting stuck in an elevator with him for 5 hours. A smile comes across his face at the memory…

/ The cranky brunette is laying on the carpet,staring blankly at the light above.. "Fucking shit it's so fucking hot in here"

Sakuma glances at him from where he is sitting, "Yeah well we are stuck… And Kidou is in a game so I can't call him…"

Fudou rolls his eyes, "You are soo gay, dude.."

The tanner teen jolts and is now glaring down at his counterpart. "Fuck off! We are close friends, okay?"

Fudou sighs, "Riiight… friends~. Soon you'll be knocked up with his _'friend'_ child"

Now it's Sakuma's turn to roll his eyes, but as he is about to make a retort he stops to see his fellow soccer player's shirt land on the side of the elevator he is sitting on. "FUDOU!"

The smaller boy looks at him with a bored expression. "It's fucking hot in here, back off.."

Sakuma sighs and looks at Fudou then, what he sees shocks him. Fudou is almost pencil thin and his skin looks fair and soft. He had no real muscle to him and even looks kinda fragile. Not like his personality at all. The tanner boy has to remember that maybe he is still maturing. Sakuma was an earlier bloomer than others.

His eyes ghost over the smaller boys body and his cheek warm some. _'He looks good shirtless… WAIT'/_

Sakuma shakes his head and keeps walking. Thinking more and more.

/"Fudou get away from me" Came hushed whispers in the dark.

"Shut it, whore.. They'll catch us soon with all your talking" was the snappy response.

The two teens ended up presses together between two buildings. Why? Because them and a couple others from the team had gotten in a fight with older kids and had to run, breaking from one another to escape. Sakuma had been pointed out and was being chased by two older boys when he felt someone grab him and pull him into that tight space. only to have his mouth covered so he wouldn't scream by none other that Fudou Akio.

_'Could the contractors have made a smaller space between bricks, seriously?!'_ His thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the older boys running past. Fudou watches them, holding Sakuma by his waist, his other hand over his mouth so he can't speak. The tanner of the two wants to be scared but all he can think about is how good Fudou smells, like fresh grass and soap… He had a banana for a snack earlier, its obvious on his breath… His face is so close.. They could almost..

"What the fuck are you looking at?"

Sakuma blushes as he noticed Fudou's eyes burning into his own. They are so.. blue… Have they always been that blue? _'I'm staring again!'_

He looks down and tries to shrinks down but it only brings him closer to the rebel boy still holding him. Talking to him in harsh, hushed tones.

"Nothing… I thought we were being quiet..?"

Fudou nods, "Yeah but you looked like you were having a weird fetish thought there for a second.."

Sakuma turns bright bright red "You ar-"

Fudou hears the boys coming back there way and freaks a little, smashing his lips into Sakuma's in a desperate attempt to shut him up. The shorter boy eeps but slowly begins kissing back. Even taking it as far as using tongue. At this Fudou's eyes widen because this just got far more serious than it was a moment ago. But eventually he kisses back the same./

Sakuma is bright red as he walks, _'Have I always been that attracted to Fudou?'_

He is lost in thought, memories, how horny he is now, that he barely notices he is in front of Fudou's house when he stops..

He looks up at his destination and his cheeks warm up some. He looks in at he house and sees Fudou walking around inside. He starts for the door, then stops with all intention to just leave. _'I need to find out why he did that to me! It's been haunting me for weeks'_

With that thought, he marches to the front door and knocks. But what answers he is not prepared for. Fudou is in low low-ride baggy pj pants and has his hair pulled back in a low pony. Sakuma can see his nipple rings and the 'v' where his lower stomach met his crotch. Now the tanner man could see muscle. His body looked so different from how it used to. Though few, he has gained a little more muscle then he used to have, he is definitely broader than when they were young. His thin figure isn't so much concerning for his health now but it is still very thin. In his own way, he is attractive. While Kidou is shorter and stockier on his chest and arms, Fudou Akio is all length and skintone. The next thing he saw was a toothy grin from the brunette. "Thought it was you… Come in.."


	4. Returning A Favor

The next thing he saw was a toothy grin from the brunette. "Thought it was you… Come in.."

Sakuma follows Fudou inside, taking his shoes and jacket off at the door. The house isn't big, on the contrary its fairly small. Nothing like the house Sakuma has with Kidou. The family room is fairly bare with only a chair and loveseat along with a television and a small side table. The kitchen is just a small open concept area with a little island for counterspace. Sakuma watches his old friend walk down the hall beside the kitchen and into a bedroom. He debates following and is about to when Fudou comes back out.

The brunette spawls out lazily in his chair and stares at the blunette with a mysterious fire in his eyes. Sakuma is tense. He needs to talk about what happened. He needs to ask what that was all about. But the more that Fudou stares at him that way the more flustered and absent minded he get. The former Midfielder crooks his finger at Sakuma so he'll come closer. The tanner man leans over to him curiously and feels his eye patch get snapped off his face. He turns bright red and covers it defensively, leaning back in the love seat. "F-Fudou what the hell?!"

He sighs and looks down, keeping his eye covered. He can hear a snicker from his teal/grey eye companion and knows he'll have to fight to get it back. But first what he came over for…

"Li-listen I need to talk to you about the other day, then I'm leaving…"

Fudou drops the eye patch and sits by his Flustered companion "Sakuma you are a terrible liar…"

He twines a lock of silver, blue hair in his fingers and speaks by Sakuma's ear, "You know exactly what that was all about… You are here because you want to make sense of it… But mostly.."

Sakuma let out a gasp and both his hands go to Fudou's wrists as he feels them snake up his shirt tease his chest. His eyes snap open and meet the brunettes with confusion and shock. He is leaned back against the arm of the loveseat with nowhere to escape. He gives slight struggle but very halfheartedly. He curses his body as it slowly gives in to what Fudou's hands are doing.

"Mostly you are here because you want to remember…"

The brunette leans into his companions ear and whispers to him as his hands slowly undress the trembling man below him. "Do you remember that date we went on during spring break back in high school..? You kissed me that night…"

Sakuma's eyes widen and he turns pink. The memory comes to his clearly as he thinks back. Every moment of that day is embedded in his mind. _/"I like you, asshole… Get a clue.."/_

He closes his eyes and even starts helping Fudou slip his clothes off. Fudou isn't surprised, in fact he takes advantage of Sakuma's decision and moves his lips down over his collarbone. The tanner man lays his head back and plays with the brunettes hair. He makes little noises at the teases He is getting. He can feel warm lips, teeth, and that accursed tongue-ring that haunts all his thought. His boy is so warm and he is going crazy at the teasing. He jolts at a sharp/pleasurable pain. "N-no hickeys, Teme!"

He can practically feel Fudou smirk against his skin… "Too late~"

Sakuma is about to attempt chewing him out when the other mans lips move down and he feels teeth graze his nipple. Fudou has never enjoyed a trembling body like this before. Sakuma's reactions are so animated and loud. He really is the perfect partner. The brunette keeps teasing and playing his way down the tanner male's body. He feels a great sense of power when he hears the ever awaiting gasp from above when he reaches his captives pants. "N-no, w-wait! Wait!"

Fudou sits up and looks into the eyes of his lover, "What?"

Sakuma gulps and shyly pushes Fudou back against the loveseat. His face is flushes and he is still trembling some but he has a very determined look on his face that makes the brunette stop and lets him do s he wishes, interested as well as nervous about his next actions. _'Don't run, please just… Don't run from me.. not now…'_

Sakuma gets in front of Fudou on the floor and looks up at him. They are both shocked and confused by this. The paler of the two just watches this and almost feels more nervous because he knows what's coming. Sakuma's eyes are so gorgeous he can't look away from them as he feels _himself_getting pulled out of his pj shorts. His eyes widen some as Sakuma's close and he licks from base to tip.

Fudou's head lays back as he feels that wet tongue tease and play over his every inch. He leans forward some to keep watching, one hand over his mouth. His blunette lover teases just at his head, playing and sucking slowly. He switches up his teasing methods periodically and just PLAYS with his new toy for a while. Fudou loves this but eventually gets impatient and his free hand grasps onto Sakuma's hair and he tugs. This makes the tanner male whimper and he does what he knows Fudou is wanting. He takes him completely into his mouth all the way to the base. Now is the brunettes turn to react. Unfortunately for Sakuma, his teme is a much quieter loves. But he eventually learns what reactions to look for. Clenching of his hair, gasps, trembling, arching of the back. He uses these signs to tell what he is doing right and wrong and adjusts his actions to his reactions.

Fudou swells in the blunette's mouth as he gets close to release. Sakuma can tell and sucks more, bobbing his head more animatedly, his hands running over the paler mans things and one even cups his balls. With all this, Fudou can't hold it in any longer and cums.

There is a noise of surprise below him and he looks to see Sakuma stay there until he is done before pulling back and putting a hand to his lips. Fudou's eyes widen as he realizes there is no messs anywhere. He watches Sakuma, the tanner males head down for a few more long moments before he looks up with flustered, dazed eyes. "How .. How was that… Fudou-kun?"

The brunette turns bright red and stares at the only evidence of what he just did, a droplet of his seed by Sakuma's mouth. '_He swallowed… God he is hot..'_


	5. The Cage You're In

It had been a month since the incident and Sakuma still felt guilty. He had been a grumpy mess all day today. Kidou had called earlier but it didn't seem to get his mind off the situation he was in. _'How could I have done that? What was I thinking..?'_

Confused and frazzled, he went to get a drink. _'Alcohol usually helps..'_

Sakuma got to the kitchen and paused, looking around at everything. His thoughts stopped as his eyes examined the room thoroughly. It was so big… so roomy.. so modern and beautiful… _'So..empty…'_

He left the kitchen as his heart started to constrict. He escaped to the hallway, looking up at their high ceiling and then down their long corridors. He walked through their living room slowly, running his handover the wall as he went. He passed through their small personal library and his office…His private office. _'That's right… We got ourselves our own private working areas where we could be ….alone…'_

A weight dropped suddenly onto his heart at the thought. His entire chest felt like it was getting tighter and tighter as he made his way up to Kidou's office. Walking in, he touches his husbands desk. Memories flow through him of when they were unpacking this room. Thinking back on it, he could almost feel the muggy heat that was this unconditioned room. Back when they left all the windows open to keep the house cool because they couldn't get the air conditioning system to work yet. How they would go through boxes together, get distracted by stupid stories and pause to look around at all their free space. _'Too much space..'_

Tears welled up in his eyes as he almost feels Kidou's arms around him, holding him, whispering to him, touching his hair, tracing his eyepatch and murmuring sweet nothings between gentle kisses.

_'I betrayed him…' _He thought. But then his thoughts turned. Heading out of the office he ventures back through the hallway. Everything was so empty… so lonely… so cold. _'How can I betray someone.. I never see…'_

Sakuma soon found himself in one of the many guest bedrooms. The blunette curled up with one of the beds many pillows, feeling physically exhausted. His chest was in-caving with the loneliness he was feeling. On the verge of tears, he closed his eyes and hopes to just pass out._'What happened to us Kidou. Why am I here, alone, thinking about how we used to be… When WE should be together laughing about how we will always be.. Will we always be.. Am I still the treasure of your heart? Was I ever?'_

His thoughts were interrupted by the phone downstairs ringing. He groaned and sat up, walking out of the room to go get the phone from the hallway. "Kidou residence, Jirou speaking.."

"Hey.." A familiar voice cooed on the other end of the line.

Sakuma felt his emotions stir up and he snapped. Though his voice seemed calm, it had a violent undertone. "I don't want to talk to you. You messed up everything. You are the reason my life is such a mess so just.. Don't call back.. Ever"

He was about to hang up but something caught his attention. A chuckle that was light and carefree. He was laughing. _Laughing!_ "Are you sure it's your life thats a mess? You live in a beautiful house.. you have a perfect husband.. Well.. besides never being home because his- ..Endou's team is taking all his attention away.."

"Shut up!" Was the only retort.. Now he was starting to lose his composure.

Fudou continued, "I thonk the only mess in your life right now.. Is you.. Dontcha think?"

Sakuma grips the phone tightly, "If you think I'm going to stay on the line just to listen to yo-"

"Why do you think you married him, ..Jirou~?" The last word was teasing, but the question was serious.

Sakuma was shocked and confused by the question. "What do you mean? I love him.."

"Why?"

Another stupid question. Sakuma wanted to know where he was going with this, it made no sense. "…Because I love him.. What kind of questions are these?"

Fudou's ironic smirk could almost be heard as he continued to probe the blunette. "Do you say that because you can truly say that you love him now or because you loved him growing up?"

Sakuma was silent. _'What? What does he even mean by that?' _"There's a difference..?"

"Well you say you love him and that's why you two got married. But do you mean it? Do you, right now, love Kidou Yuuto will all your heart? Or it is. You _did_love him…. And because it was for so long.. you just continued saying you loved him because it was earier than admitting you were over it? That maybe after he finally realized your feeling, they were already gone?" The brunette pondered.

The silence on the other end of the line made him continue. "I think, that you waited for him for so long.. that you just.. got used to the idea of liking him.. and now you are trying to reconnect what faded all those years ago.. It's why you get so frazzled when he leaves.. It's why you could accepted all my date requests when we were younger, even grudgingly.."

Sakuma's anger had all left him at this point. His heart felt empty all of a sudden. He felt cold. He continued to listen to this… this _bullcrap…_But… "I.." The tanner man shook his head. "We went on like.. _two_ dates ever… and they weren't even-"

Fudou let out a sigh. "You are missing the point.. You don't love Kidou anymore.."

"You..You're just trying to confuse me more… Stop spewing bullshit!" The blunette snapped.

"You don't love him."

"STOP!"

"You haven't loved him for a long time."

"SHUT UP, YOU ARE SUCH A LIER!"

Fudous voice started to raise now. "You only married him because you felt like you had to, becuase he asked. And even then maybe he only asked because he felt like it was expected. You need to stop denyin- !" He stopped at a thud noise.

Sakuma had fallen to his knees and clenched the phone with both hands, wanting to throw it but cradle it. He sniffled, feeling the tears falling down his cheek. "…just…stop… please"

The brunette went quiet and listened to his companions small sobs into the phone… He felt guilty but knew he was right.. He just needed Sakuma to realize it.. "…You're… alone… aren't you? …In your marriage, I mean…"

More silent sobs are heard but no real response, so he continued, his voice gentle and comforting. "I.. want to help you.. but… I won't push you back into the little cage he has you in.. I'm trying.. to pull you out.."

* * *

_Probably has a lot of spelling errors and uncapitalized or unnecessarily capitalized letters but its like 2 a.m._

_Thank you for continuing to read and being patient with me_


End file.
